I have been thinking about the past months being a SAHM.
Initially I started out with a teeny weeny bit of grudges against my Mother. Then I saw all the possibilities together with little man. Now almost 3 months into this role, I actually feel relieved to have chosen this path for this period.
I was telling Hubby about how less stressful it was now, as compared to when I was still working. And I am not talking about the work load.
Back in the days when I was working, it was extremely stressful for me whenever I see little man sneeze or cough, because back in my mind, I know it could develop to something big. Then I had to start thinking about who to take leave if little man is sick. Do we still take him to school even if he is not feverish? What about my students in school? Do I have anything for them to do during this time that I need to be away to care for my baby? Do I have enough childcare leave? Does Hubby have enough annual leave?
My work does not allow me annual leave. I only have 6 days childcare leave in a year, which are not even sufficient for a one-time hospitalisation of little man. Poor hubby has to be the one taking leaves. We are really grateful that he has understanding bosses, but we are constantly worrying that eventually this will leave a black mark in Hubby’s potential progression.
To be able to put my entire mind on little man, is the best thing I can ever do for him as a mother. We have grown so much closer these months, and I feel like little man has learnt much more than he had back in infant care.
The situation that led to this decision, is really a blessing in disguise.
God has a plan for us. Through these experiences, I start to believe, and learn to let go, and let God.